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Showing posts from August, 2017

The Acquaintance

She said Can you remember the exact moment when your friend became an acquaintance. Because I can't. I have spend years trying to figure it out. Trying to keep in touch with someone who so obviously didn't care enough. Of course, self doubt always crept in, not understanding where and when this happened. Or what precise incident made this happen. You keep going back to that moment where you might have done something wrong, but really, maybe you haven't.  I don't know if I have.  All I remember was that she was my best friend. I used to believe that friends can be your soulmates too, and she was mine. I defended her with a vigour, when loyalty was only given to those friends you truly trust. High school days, and friendships that barely scratched the surface, she was the only person I couldn't abandon and the only place where my loyalties were. She was family.  I knew when her ambitions changed, I knew her when she dated the guy I had a crush on and laughed i...

The Beauty within

The mind I'm going to smile and pretend and tell you this story.  I am okay. I have been okay. I will be okay. I have been saying this to everyone, I don't see a reason to speak the truth now.  I am fine. It wasn't me who stood at that ledge that one time. It might have been my body standing there waiting for the right moment, for the winds to shift, for my feet to slip, but it wasn't me. This mind is fine.  Do you mind if I light up a smoke? I picked up this habit a while back, existential crisis, I like to call it. A mid life, scratch that, a quarter life crisis. But I am going to quit. I will, the moment, my life decides it has meaning. I am not dependent on it. I mean, I used to smoke when I used to feel sad but nowadays I don't feel sad anymore. I mean I hardly feel anything. I am really happy. Ecstatic. Nothing brings me down anymore.  What's that? Am I lying? I don't lie. I never lie. I wouldn't say never because every body lies right? Y...